The sound guy (or gal) is the most important component of your show that most bands don't really think about. They can break your set (few sound engineers can actually MAKE your set if you suck).
So, you have to know how to approach sound guys right and get them on your team for the short amount of time that you have with them.
1) Get His NameThe first thing you should do is introduce yourself to the sound guy when you arrive. Shake his hand, look him in the eye and exchange names. Remember his name - you're most likely going to need to use it many many times that night and possibly a couple times through the mic during your set. If you begin treating him with respect from the get go he will most likely return this sentiment.
2) Respect Her EarsAll sound engineers take pride in their mixing. Regardless of the style of music they like listening to in their car, they believe they can mix any genre on the spot. However, most sound engineers will appreciate hearing what you, the musician, likes for a general house mix of your band's sound. Don't be afraid to tell her a vibe or general notes ("we like the vocals and acoustic very high in the mix" or "we like keeping all vocal mics at about the same level for blended harmonies" or "add lots of reverb on the lead vocals, but keep the fiddle dry"). She'll appreciate knowing what you like and will cater to that. She is most likely a musician herself, so treat her as one - with respect. She knows music terms - don't be afraid to use them.
3) Don't Start Playing Until He's ReadySet up all of your gear but don't start wailing on the guitar or the drums until all the mics are in place and he's back by the board. Pounding away on the kit while he's trying to set his mics will surely piss him off and ruin his ears. Get there early enough for sound check so you have plenty of time to feel the room out (and tune your drums).
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4) Have An Input List
5) How To Insult Your Sound GuyCall him "yo sound man" if you want to piss him off. You got his name, use it. Or ask him politely again if you forgot. Don't tell him that the house mix is "off" or "bad." Everything is subjective. It may not be what you like, but it's obviously what he likes. He most likely has WAY more experience mixing than you do. So get specific about what you like and don't like for your band's house mix from the get go or shut the hell up.
6) Know Your ShitKnow how you like your vocals EQed generally so you can say that. You can say "can we drop some of the highs on the vocals in the house." You shouldn't say "the vocals sound piercing - they hurt my ears." You should know how your gear works inside and out so if anything goes wrong you point to the sound gal last. Pointing to her first is a sure way to piss her off.
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7) He's Part of the ClubThe sound guy, door guy, bartender, booker, managers and servers are co-workers. Just like you and your fellow baristas are co-workers. They hangout, have work parties, hit the bars together and they talk. If you're a dick to the bartender he'll tell the sound guy and the sound guy may then decide to fuck up your set out of spite. Or just not put any effort into mixing you.
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8) Everyone Wants A Great ShowBelieve it or not, your sound gal wants to perform at her best just like you do. Make her job easy by showing up prepared and not sucking. She most likely has her shit together so make sure you have your shit together as well and don't fuck up on stage.
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9) The ChipThere are sound guys out there (we've all worked with them) who seem like they have a massive chip on their shoulder from the moment they step in the club. These guys are typically older, failed musicians who have been at this club for decades. They are hardened from years of working with dick musicians who not only suck, but believe they are rock stars and that the sound guy is a peon - and treat him as such. You may not be able to change his outlook on life, but treat him with respect and dignity from the get go and he may lighten up just enough to put some effort into mixing your set.
Even though it should go without saying, use the golden rule. If you treat your sound guy as you'd like to be treated and work WITH (not against) him on putting together a great show - you most likely will have one.
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